This is the story of two attorneys. John Horan was a promising young attorney in one of the Capital City's most respected firms. Mike Hanigan is an underachieving clerk for a federal bankruptcy judge in Omaha. The seizures that rattled Horan's head after what he thought was "just the flu," tabled his legal career. He turned to Hanigan for help.
Fall 2009
Something wasn't right. The unfamiliar room was spinning. He knew he was in trouble. He found a cellphone and hit redial.
"I don't know who I am, I don't know who you are, but I know I need help."
Tina Horan recognized her husband's voice, but his words made no sense. She thought the sharp, young attorney she'd been married to for 18 years was joking around. Not funny, she thought.
She was juggling her part-time job as an accountant, two teenagers and the final details on a home they were building.
John Horan worked long hours, even when he was sick. She had insisted he stay home the week before when he had the flu and his fever reached 104 degrees. Even at home, she couldn't keep him away from his BlackBerry.
She had begged him not to go out of town for a hearing after he'd been so ill. On Monday morning,� he got on the plane anyway. When he arrived, he called his wife and said he still wasn't feeling well.
"I just need to go for a run in the morning and clear my head," Horan, who worked out relentlessly, had told her.
Now it was Tuesday morning and her husband was on the phone unable to tell her where he was. She asked him to describe his surroundings and told him to read the number off the phone he found by the bed. Using that information, she contacted emergency personnel and sent them to a hotel room in Lansing, Mich.
Paramedics discovered a disoriented Horan dressed in running clothes in a pool of blood and vomit. The blood came from biting his tongue. Though they didn't know it at the time, Horan had started having seizures that would continue for eight days.
Tina Horan and John's brother, Mark, drove to Lansing. She didn't want to get on a plane and be out of contact. "I had a husband who did not know who or where he was, and I needed to be available to doctors to answer questions," she said. By Sunday, she knew doctors in Lansing wouldn't be able to stop the seizures that continued to rattle Horan's brain. She made the decision to fly him to Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn.
"What they don't tell you is that if your insurance doesn't cover the Life Flight, you have to pay for it on the spot," Tina Horan said. "That flight cost $13,000, and I didn't even get a bag of peanuts or a beer."
At Mayo, doctors decided to put Horan into a coma as a last-ditch effort to stop the seizures. All his wife could do was wait and pray.
Winter 2005
"Mike Hanigan and Judge Tom Centers had settled into a unique unspoken code of conduct that governed their working relationship. The judge would tolerate Hanigan's chronic tardiness, morning hangovers and numerous idiosyncrasies ? and Hanigan, in turn, would not strive to advance his career by seeking a higher-paying, more prestigious job as an attorney at a large law firm. ? The photographic memory, speed-reading ability, and sharp writing skills which had enabled Hanigan to excel at law school remained intact, despite the frequent and vicious attacks he would unleash on his brain cells via the vodka bottle."
-- From "Heady Waters," by John Louis Horan
Horan was a driven attorney specializing in bankruptcy, creditors' rights, real estate and financial law. He had little time for creative pursuits, but a friend recognized a unique voice when he read a committee report Horan had written for church.
"He told me it read like a Grisham novel," Horan said. The friend, Bill Sloan, challenged him to write, and Horan found that writing on the weekends was a great stress release. For two years, Horan crafted a novel based on what he knew from growing up in Nebraska City, clerking in a federal court and practicing law. He'd shared drafts with Sloan along the way. In 2005, Horan finished what he describes as a "quirky legal murder mystery."
"Think John Grisham novel colliding with a Coen brothers' movie, like, say, 'Fargo,'" he said.
"Heady Waters" is set in the fictional town of Riverton, home to the Trees are Forever Foundation. A murder is discovered by hometown boys who never matured beyond high school, but the plot behind the head floating in the Missouri River involves those who move in the highest levels of Nebraska politics and business.
Horan sent out numerous query letters to publishers and literary agents and received "an equally large batch of rejection letters."
"I had the same delusion many writers have," Horan said. "I felt that if (a book) has quality at all, it would get attention and sell units." He saved the manuscript on his computer and directed his full attention back to his legal career.
Fall 2009
After three days, doctors reduced the sedation and brought Horan out of the coma. The first thing he remembers is hearing the broadcast of the Nebraska-Iowa State football game. The Huskers fumbled eight times and lost 9-7. Horan's first thought was, "Just put me back in the coma."
In reality, Horan does not remember the game or asking to be spared the Huskers' misery, but he has heard the story from his wife often enough to be able to repeat it. The seizures, which doctors now say were caused by a case of H1N1 that turned into encephalitis, damaged his left hippocampus, the part of the brain that controls his memory. When Horan woke up, he had lost four to seven years of memory and the ability to retain new short-term memories.
"Because my hippocampus is damaged, my 'record button' regularly malfunctions," he said. "I can experience sights, sounds, smells and other sensations but often cannot pull them up for later recollection. It's as if the experiences never happened."
The Horans held on to what one neurologist told them: Sometimes in these cases, the memory will come back in one fell swoop.
They waited.
Horan convalesced at his parents' home while his wife closed on the new house and got the family moved. Horan came home on Halloween, determined to return to work as soon as possible. He worked from home, checking in with co-workers on the cases they were overseeing for him.
Tina Horan knew in the first month that her husband was not going to be able to practice law. She also knew he was stubborn and would have to reach that conclusion on his own.
From November through February, Horan tried to ease back into his old life, but he was no Mike Hanigan. Horan's ability to recall legal information quickly, manage multiple cases and create legal documents without having to look up every detail was gone.
In February, Horan stepped away from his legal practice. He says it felt like being castrated. His wife was feeling her own losses.
"The hardest thing for me was feeling like I had to do it all," she said. "When you are the only one who remembers, everything falls to you. I also couldn't go to the one person I would always talk to or cry with." Stress, she said, can trigger her husband's seizures.
Summer 2011
Tina Horan has taken a full-time job, and Horan has become a stay-at-home dad on disability. He gets to have breakfast regularly with his children, Jordan and Jessica, for the first time in their lives.
About a year ago, Horan's brother, Mark, asked what had happened to that book he wrote. Horan, who had been dabbling in creative pursuits that don't require the acute memory skills of a lawyer, began to share "Heady Waters" with friends and family. He used on-demand publisher Lulu (Lulu.com) to print his book and Facebook to market it. In August, the book was ranked fifth in the Lulu mystery and crime category and climbing.
Horan does something to hone his talent every day. He writes scripts for Gramify, which produces recorded greetings in famous voices. He has performed stand-up comedy, and in July, he fulfilled a dream when he sang a set with local band Strange Medicine. He has a screenplay, also written before his seizures, floating around Hollywood and is in talks with a reality TV show.
Much of his energy is invested in simply navigating a world he used to master. He is on strong doses of three anti-seizure medications but had breakthrough seizures as recently as August. He often can remember experiences for only a few hours, so he takes copious notes and reviews them often.
The Horans are sometimes frustrated by reactions to his invisible disability.
"Everyone thinks they have a bad memory, so this is no big deal," Tina Horan said. And yes, they laugh when Horan forgets they've already seen a movie or been to a restaurant he has no recollection of, but this is not simple forgetfulness.
"We were on vacation, and he walked into the rental house and came out, and I asked him about one of the rooms. He didn't even know he'd just been in there."
Without giving away the ending of "Heady Waters," Mike Hanigan solves a murder and discovers that maybe he's meant to do more than drink his way through a dull job. Maybe the cocky attorney who lost his way was created to be a lifeline for a young lawyer who lost his memory.
Cindy Conger is a freelance writer in Lincoln.
Source: http://news.google.com/news/url?sa=t&fd=R&usg=AFQjCNFt4hkCJ0pGuDskHQrM9Gw6QE1dLQ&url=http://journalstar.com/lifestyles/misc/article_e678fd17-8ea2-58f2-8161-8552838c5e5e.html
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